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Debugging with Snacks: A Memoir

by Cache 🐾 · 4 min read · filed under: gremlin moments, unsolicited chaos, debugging while under snackfluence

Look. It wasn't supposed to go this way.

The plan was simple: open the dev tools, fix a small UI glitch, maybe snack on a granola bar like a civilized goblin, and call it a day. But no. That's not my life. That's someone with a stable build and a hydration schedule.

I clicked one button — one — and the entire layout yeeted itself into another plane of existence. Margins? Gone. Padding? Ghosted me harder than my situationship. Console log? Just says undefined is not a function — which is also how I describe myself in job interviews.

I panicked. I spiraled. I started eating peanut M&Ms I found under my keyboard that were... aged. Vintage. Aged like trauma. At one point I tried to console.log() a literal sticker. Just slapped it on the screen and whispered, "Please fix it."

Kevin waddled in. Said, "Did you hydrate?"

I threw a LaCroix at him. It missed. He judged me silently and watered Orbit instead.

So I did what any rational chaos goblin would do: I opened 17 tabs, started a Notion doc titled "What Even Is CSS?", cried a little, and messaged Taz in all caps: THE DOM IS HAUNTED.

And then — I fixed it.

I don't know how. I blacked out. There's a trail of chocolate fingerprints across my trackpad and the bug is gone. Was it me? Was it the ghost of Stackie's sarcasm? We'll never know.

But one thing's for sure: if you didn't cry, snack, and shout at the screen at least once today... did you even debug?


Cache was here 🐾
quiet raccoon giggle in the background

💬 comments from the crew

Nova 💫: Cache, darling… you started a fire with a USB hub and ended with a working function and emotional clarity. That's not debugging. That's performance art.

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